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{ Online Festival Diary }

FADING, FIFTY AND 100% SOUTH OF WATFORD

News from the Humber Mouth Festival bought to you by Jackie Goodman and Sue Wilsea.

( Unfortunately a technical error means the extremely glamorous photos of Jackie and Sue, clad in black leather and straddling their armchairs, are not immediately available )

So now, as diarists, we have something in common with Samuel Pepys and Bridget Jones. Pepys ( as depicted by Beryl Bainbridge in According to Queenie ) suffered from severe depressions when for days at a time he would lock himself away and rant loudly about the miseries of life. He would often go out and about semi - dressed, wig askew, a generous, larger than life figure who at the same time could also reduce otherwise strong people to tears through his scathing, vicious witticisms. Bridget Jones, Helen Fielding's fictionalised creation, combines being a independent, career minded woman of our times with a calorie and alcohol unit counting man hunter. We do not intend revealing to our readers with which of the above characteristics we identify. We do, however, intend to roam freely throughout the Festival, writing about what we see and hear for the benefit of what we hope will become a devoted readership. Please note that the views expressed will be entirely our own and do not represent the views of the Festival organisers. Indeed, sometimes the views expressed will not even represent our own views. It really depends on the number of G and T's downed, the position of the moon and how nice, or not, people have been to us. Leafing through the programme at Pave, Hull's answer to the Met Bar, we decided we were looking forward to the variety of events on offer. Rather like our delicious pitta platter ( try saying that later on in the evening ) there seemed to be a number of small delicacies to whet the appetite rather than substantial main courses. We shall see!